When you feel alone ~ you enjoy the quiet moment and yet, you feel alone. When you know God is your guide and yet you wonder if you are really following. When you feel as if you don’t matter, yet others count on you. When it seems like everyone is living love with family and yet you feel alone. When you feel you’ve made so many mistakes and being lonely is the result. And yet..love is here. God is here and He is mine. Even amidst my mistakes, my Savior forgives me and is leading me Home. I am following and when I fail Him, He lovingly and gently leads me along. He brought me here to love and encourage others in Jesus’ love and when I need it I have God’s Word. When others don’t have time to give, I rest in knowing my ulitmate comfort can only come from God. The fear of rejection is real and reaching out only to be ignored or said no to is hard on my heart. It makes me feel as if something is wrong with me. So then, it’s easier to just be alone where I’m safe and let love come to me when they want. My heart is always open to those I love but I’m not sure I give what they want. Am I selfish? I hope not. Do I make known that I love them beyond words? I hope so. Would I love to hear I am loved? I would.
I hang onto my God who loves me best. I pray that He would make me a person that brings love and looks for nothing in return. I pray that I would not think about me but instead think about all those times I have rejected others and said no to them. Although my intent could never be to hurt them, I’m sure that’s what I do when I think of myself first and others second.
Loneliness is real and it plagues us all. In life I’ve learned that love and kindness is something each of us desire. I’ve learned that wanting it is a deep need for us all, but reaching out to love and be kind is something so much different. It’s easier to be the victim instead of being the one to reach out. It’s funny really, but it’s when we reach out and think more of others than self that those lonely feelings
go away.
So Lord, teach me on those days to reach out and love. Lord, teach me on those days to remember feelings are only feelings. Feelings aren’t usually truth but are just what happens on those days.
